John Cusack

How did you know this was going to happen?

It's not just California. It's the whole god damn world that is going to shit.

I just need to find out who killed my friend.

My friend was an American agent. What was he working on?

You know, this whole country has its head buried in the sand.

If you stand with us you will be butchered.

I'm Lucious, commanding general.

I'm going to create the greatest album ever, Mar.

I know, Bri.

Gratifying movie. At first I didn't like having 2 adult actors playing one role, but it ends up working. Worth seeing.

So when you hear the smoking sign go 'ding', you know everything's going to be okay.

Wait for beep.

I don't want to sell anything, buy anything, or process anything as a career. I don't want to sell anything bought or processed, or buy anything sold or processed, or process anything sold, bought, or processed, or repair anything sold, bought, or processed. You know, as a career, I don't want to do that.

Nobody really thinks it will work, do they?

No. You just described every great success story.

I feel like a refugee from the Island of Doctor Moreau.

I feel like a refugee from The Island of Dr. Moreau.

That's the entry wound of a Rochester 47 automatic with scope-laser aim and silencer. The most precise weapon on the market. And the quietest. Now you know the meaning of stage fright.

No one can save you now!

Wanna bet?

I'll have a double anything.

Health! The open seseme to the sucker's purse.

Health! The open seseme to the sucker's purse.

In fact, I hope we're not in love anymore, to be honest. It would give me a better opinion of love right now.

Come on! What, did I beat you? Did I tell you you were a bad person? I mean, what the fuck? What shoul I have done to make you happy?

Come on! What, did I beat you? Did I tell you you were a bad person? I mean, what the fuck? What should I have done to make you happy?

Nothing. Make yourself happy.

Oh, I see. Um, wh-why am I not happy?

Because you're the same person you used to be.. and I'm not.

Do you really think I'm royalty?

You know I do!

Then stop bossing me around!

You were the boy, weren't you - the servant boy who got us out? You saved her life and mine and you restored her to me. Yet you want no reward

Not anymore.

Why the change of mind?

It was more a change of heart. I must go.

She certainly has a mind of her own.

Yeah. I hate that in a woman.

(last lines) I wanna go home.

I wanna go home.

(last lines) Let's... let's go home.

Let's... let's go home.

No, no, don't speak. Don't speak. Please don't speak. Please don't speak. No. No. No. Go. Go, gentle Scorpio, go. Your Pisces wishes you every happy return.

Just one...

Don't speak.

Okay. Favorite movie.

The correct answer is Cool Hand Luke.

I've never seen it.

Oh, come on. You've never seen Cool Hand Luke? Paul Newman? Oh my god. Come on! "Failure to communicate." Sadistic cop in sunglasses with no name. Reminds me of you in that way.

Um, favorite New York moment.

This one's climbing the charts.

Words are magic. Sometimes I think the whole world is strung together by words.

There's no future in the future.

When are you going with my plane, Cyrus?

We're going to Disney Land.

You're lying, Cyrus.

So are you, Vince.

Ohh.. Nothing makes me sadder than the agent lost his bladder in the.. aaiirrplane!!

Oh. Nothing makes me sadder than the agent lost his bladder in the airplane!

$ 8 for beer nuts. This room is EVIL

$8 for beer nuts? This room is evil.

I possessed a certain moral ambiguity the CIA was looking for.

It's all a matter of character. Of course, if I had any character, I wouldn't have stolen 2 million dollars from my boss.

People always say that there's no such thing as the perfect crime. But I don't agree with that.

I'd do it again

I'd do it again.

Kate, California is going down! Pack up the kids, now!

They just got back. God you sound like a crazy person, the Governor says we're fine now.

That guy is an actor, he's reading a script! When the tell you not to panic, that's when you run!

"Sometimes you can't get rid if bad memories, you just gotta live with them"

Sometimes you can't get rid if bad memories, you just gotta live with them.

I gave her my heart, and she gave me a pen.

Listen, I've been trapped.

...but where's the bone-chilling terror?

Is this it?

Go to hell!

I have been a selfish man but I don't have to die that way.

The only thing he's ever killed is a bottle of brandy.

Take this kiss upon thy brow

Take this kiss upon the brow!

Quoth the raven "Nevermore"

Quoth the raven 'Nevermore'.

The room's gotta be filthy. I mean, the sheets haven't been changed in... what, eleven years?

No no no. We're very professional here. 1408 gets a light turn once a month. I supervise, the maids work in pairs. We treat the room as if it's a chamber filled with poison gas. We only stay 10 minutes and I insist the door remain open. But still... A few years ago a young maid from El Salvador found herself locked in the bathroom. She was only there for a few moments, but when we pulled her out she was-

She was dead?

No. Blind. She had taken a pair of scissors and gouged her eyes out. She was laughing hysterically.

Well, now that you got your map where are we going?

(opens up the map up to find it only has China on it) We're gonna need a bigger plane.

[opens up the map up to find it only has China on it] We're gonna need a bigger plane.

Did you read Gordie's story?

What is that?

The state of Hawaii.

Not good. That is not good.

How much fuel do we have?

Not much, We'll have make an emergency landing somewhere in South China Sea.

Great. At least we don't need the landing gear.

What happened to it?

Well, we've lost it all, in Vegas.

I will gladly give my life for hers, Mr. Fields

I will gladly give my life for hers, Mr. Fields.

If we live through this, remind me to thank you.

Lloyd, why do you have to be like this?

'Cause I'm a guy. I have pride.

You're not a guy.

I Am.

No. The world is full of guys. Be a man. Don't be a guy.

Nobody really thinks it will work, do they?

No. You just described every great success story.

Stay Scared..

Stay scared..

Stay scared.

WHO THE HECK IS THAT?

that's our pilot!

That's our pilot!

OUR PILOT HOW ARE WE GONNA GET OUTTA HERE?

OUR PILOT? HOW ARE WE GONNA GET OUTTA HERE?

...I agreed that what really matters is what you like, not what you are like... Books, records, films - these things matter. Call me shallow but it's the fuckin' truth, and by this measure I was having one of the best dates of my life.

I'm tired of the fantasy, because it doesn't really exist. And there are never really any surprises, and it never really...

Delivers?

Delivers. And I'm tired of it. And I'm tired of everything else for that matter. But I don't ever seem to get tired of you, so...

Now, the making of a good compilation tape is a very subtle art. Many do's and don'ts. First of all you're using someone else's poetry to express how you feel. This is a delicate thing.

What came first, the music or the misery? People worry about kids playing with guns, or watching violent videos, that some sort of culture of violence will take them over. Nobody worries about kids listening to thousands, literally thousands of songs about heartbreak, rejection, pain, misery and loss. Did I listen to pop music because I was miserable? Or was I miserable because I listened to pop music?

Listen, Rob, would you have sex with me? Because I want to feel something else than this. It either that, or I go home and put my hand in the fire. Unless you want to stub cigarettes out on my arm.

No. I only have a few left, I've been saving them for later.

Right. It'll have to be sex, then.

Right. Right.

Sh*t, man, I gotta go back to, um, *cough* earth.

Somebody better call his Momma!

Some say Lawyers make the best Profession. Here I am, an Actor, taking in millions for a bomb!

No matter how this ends I will kill him.

It seems my own writing has become the inspiration for an actual killer.

Why can't you be in a good mood? How hard is it to decide to be in a good mood and be in a good mood once in a while?

You think you're going to miss it?

Miss what? Your talking?

No. Russia.

Get in the car!

I think it's safer down here!

Get in the f***ing car!!

Get in the f***ing car!

Look at me, look at me, do I look scared?

Umm hummm

Umm hummm.

[inside Charlie's camper] That guy's crazy. Right, daddy?

No. I don't think so.

[to pilot] Here. Take this. This is a very expensive watch. My editor gave it to me when he thought I was gonna be somebody.

[looks at his watch after being awaken by the morning news] I'm a dead man. I'm a dead man.

[as Kate's house is collapsing in an earthquake] Get in the fucking car!

No matter what happens, we'll all stay together.

So, where are we headed?

We're gonna need a bigger plane.

I think, I feel, I suffer.

(Knocks Gordon's car into earthquake crack) Sorry.

[knocks Gordon's car into earthquake crack] Sorry.

I'm gonna take out Diane Court again.

Well that's unlikely.

We shared the most intimate thing two people can share.

No, Lloyd, we shared the most intimate thing two people can share...

You shared it with a dick.

You shared it with a dick.

She only speaks French, Roy. She doesn't speak imbecile

She only speaks French, Roy. She doesn't speak imbecile.

i killed the president of paraguay with a for, how have you been?

I killed the president of Paraguay with a fork. How've you been?

What happens when a man goes through his own portal?

"Hey Laura! If you really wanted to screw me up, you should've gotten to me earlier!"

Hey Laura! If you really wanted to screw me up, you should've gotten to me earlier!

Nathan Jones, A.K.A. Diamond Dog. Former general of the Black Guerillas. He blew up a meeting of the National Rifle Association saying, and I quote, "They represented the basest negativity of the white race." He wrote a book in prison called, "Reflections in a Diamond Eye." New York Times called it a wakeup call for the black community. They're talking to Denzel for the movie.

Nathan Jones, A.K.A. Diamond Dog. Former general of the Black Guerillas. He blew up a meeting of the National Rifle Association saying, and I quote, 'They represented the basest negativity of the white race.' He wrote a book in prison called, 'Reflections in a Diamond Eye.' New York Times called it a wakeup call for the black community. They're talking to Denzel for the movie.

They say you can't die in your dreams... is that true?

I'm going out to buy some cigarettes.

Do you know what a metaphysical can of worms this portal is?

Nobody's looking for a puppeteer in today's wintry economic climate.

The rain on my car is a baptism, the new me, Ice Man, Power Lloyd, my assault on the world begins now

Where have you been all my life?

Gift shop.

I hate this decade!

I gave her my heart and she gave me a pen.