Scream 2 - Movie Quotes - Rotten Tomatoes

Scream 2 Quotes

  • Sidney Prescott: I'm a fighter.

  • Randy Meeks: I'd let the geek, get the girl.

  • Mickey: The Empire Strikes Back. Better story, improved effects.
    Randy Meeks: Not a sequel. Part of a trilogy. Completely planned.
    Hallie: I like those little furry things.
    Mickey: They're Ewoks. They blow.

  • Maureen Evans: Bitch! Hang the phone up and Star-69 his ass! Damn!..
    Maureen Evans: Bitch! Hang the phone up and Star-69 his ass! Damn!
    Phil Stevens: Sshh!..
    Phil Stevens: Sshh!

  • Gale Weathers: Anyway, you're forgetting something. In Woodsboro, there were more victims before the homestretch.; Tatum, my cameraman, Himbry--
    Gale Weathers: Anyway, you're forgetting something. In Woodsboro, there were more victims before the homestretch.; Tatum, my cameraman, Himbry...
    Joel: Time out! I don't need to be hearing about no dead cameramen, all right? Now I'm warning you guys. I am a verb away from vacating these premises. I'm gonna get me some coffee, donuts, Prozac, see If I can find some crack, Special KX, "not Malcolm and I'll be back when you guys start talking about something a little more Saved By The Bellish, all right?
    Dewey Riley: He seems a little shaky.
    Gale Weathers: Don't worry about him. If the killer is following a pattern, maybe we can figure out who's next.

  • Sidney Prescott: Three hundred people watched. Nobody did anything. They thought it was publicity stunt, for Christ's sakes.
    Randy Meeks: [with Cockney accent] And it would have been a good one too.
    Randy Meeks: And it would have been a good one too.
    Sidney Prescott: It's starting again Randy.
    Randy Meeks: [with Cockney accent again] It's not. A lot of shit happens at the movies. People get robbed, shot, maimed, murdered. Multiplex is just a very dangerous place to be these days.
    Randy Meeks: It's not. A lot of shit happens at the movies. People get robbed, shot, maimed, murdered. Multiplex is just a very dangerous place to be these days.
    Sidney Prescott: Yeah, and you are in extreme denial.
    Sidney Prescott: Yeah and you are in extreme denial.

  • Cotton Weary: How bad is it?
    Gale Weathers: Just bounced off my ribs.
    Cotton Weary: Geez, Gale, you got more lives than a cat.

  • Dewey Riley: When did she started smoking?
    Randy Meeks: Ever since those nude pictures on the internet.
    Gale Weathers: It was just my head, it was Jennifer Aniston's body!

  • Randy Meeks: There are certain rules that one must abide by in order to create a successful sequel. Number one: the body count is always bigger. Number two: the death scenes are always much more elaborate - more blood, more gore - *carnage candy*. And number three: never, ever, under any circumstances, assume the killer is dead.

  • Sidney Prescott: I want to know who is it.
    Hallie: No, no, Sid.
    Sidney Prescott: I'm going back.
    Hallie: Stupid people go back, smart people run. We're smart people so we should get the fuck outta here.

  • Sidney Prescott: I want to know who is it.
    Hallie: No, no, Sid.
    Sidney Prescott: I'm going back.
    Hallie: Stupid people go back, smart people run. We're smart people so we should get the fuck outta here.

  • Debbie Salt: Oh! Mickey was a good boy, but my God! That whole "Blame-the-movies" motive? Did you buy that for one second? The poor boy was completely out of his mind.
    Debbie Salt: Oh! Mickey was a good boy, but my God! That whole 'Blame-the-movies' motive? Did you buy that for one second? The poor boy was completely out of his mind.
    Dewey Riley: And you're not?
    Sidney Prescott: And you're not?
    Debbie Salt: No. I'm very sane. My motive isn't as 90's as Mickey's. Mine is just good, old-fashioned revenge. You killed my son! And now I kill you, and I can't think of anything more rational!

  • Mickey: Don't you know history repeats itself?

  • Debbie Salt: (As Ghostface) What's your favorite scary movie?
    Debbie Salt: [as Ghostface] What's your favorite scary movie?
    Randy Meeks: Showgirls, absolutely terrifying!

  • Joel: Man, that was cold...
    Gale Weathers: Hey, you'd better check your conscience at the door sweetie. I'm not here to be loved.

  • Cici Cooper: Hello Ted.
    Debbie Salt: You wish it was Ted. (Cici getting scared) Don't forget to set the alarm...
    Debbie Salt: You wish it was Ted. [Cici getting scared] Don't forget to set the alarm...

  • Sidney Prescott: You forgot one thing about Billy.
    Mickey: Oh yeah?
    Sidney Prescott: I fucking killed him.

  • Dewey Riley: Page! 42.. Deputy Dewey oozed with inexperience...(pause more a moment)
    Dewey Riley: Page 42! Deputy Dewey oozed with inexperience... [pause more a moment]
    Gale Weathers: Hey, don't you think you're overreacting just a little bit?
    Dewey Riley: no.. what I think is that you're money hungry, fame-seeking and forgive me for saying, mediocre writer. You got a cold-storage shed where your heart should be, no offense intended.
    Dewey Riley: No.. what I think is that you're money hungry, fame-seeking and forgive me for saying, mediocre writer. You got a cold-storage shed where your heart should be, no offense intended.
    Gale Weathers: Dewey i never meant to imply-
    Gale Weathers: Dewey I never meant to imply...
    Dewey Riley: How do you know that my dimwitted inexperience isn't merely a subtle form of manipulation just to lower people's expectations thereby enhancing my ability to effectively manouver without any given situation!!!
    Dewey Riley: How do you know that my dimwitted inexperience isn't merely a subtle form of manipulation just to lower people's expectations thereby enhancing my ability to effectively manouver without any given situation!

  • Randy Meeks: can't you see she's planning for her next book, that's what reporter's do Dewey, they stage the news!
    Randy Meeks: Can't you see she's planning for her next book, that's what reporter's do Dewey, they stage the news!
    Dewey Riley: No, Gale's a lot of things, but gale's not a killer...
    Randy Meeks: com'on just because your sweet on her...
    Randy Meeks: Com'on just because your sweet on her...
    Dewey Riley: no I'm not..
    Dewey Riley: No I'm not..
    Randy Meeks: Please! this is me,talking Randy, the unrequited love slave of Sidney Prescott, know all about obsession (shows his bullet shut to Dewey) and pain...
    Randy Meeks: Please! this is me,talking Randy, the unrequited love slave of Sidney Prescott, know all about obsession [shows his bullet shut to Dewey] and pain...

  • Randy Meeks: (Randy answered the cellphone)Gale's not here!
    Randy Meeks: [Randy answered the cellphone] Gale's not here!
    Mickey: (with the voice of ghostface) I'm not interrupting anything am i? you little three are deep in thought, have you ever felt the knife cut through human flesh and scrape the bone beneath.... hehehehe....
    Mickey: [with the voice of ghostface] I'm not interrupting anything am I? you little three are deep in thought, have you ever felt the knife cut through human flesh and scrape the bone beneath.... hehehehe....

  • Randy Meeks: What's your favorite scary movie?
    Mickey: [as Ghostface] You'll never find me!
    Randy Meeks: Yeah, what do you care? Let them have their fun.
    Mickey: [as Ghostface] What's your favorite scary movie?
    Randy Meeks: Showgirls. Absolutely frightening.

  • Randy Meeks: [Gale's phone rings and Randy answers it] Gale's not here!
    Mickey: [as Ghostface] I'm not interrupting anything, am I? You three look deep in thought. Have you ever felt a knife cut through human flesh and scrape the bone beneath? [maniacal laugh]
    Randy Meeks: It's him.
    Dewey Riley: Who?
    Randy Meeks: The killer. He can see us. All three of us.

  • Sidney Prescott: and you're not?
    Sidney Prescott: You're not?
    Debbie Salt: no, I'm very sane. my motive isn't as 90's as Mickey's. Mine is just good old-fashioned revenge. you killed my son. and now i kill you when i can't think of anything more rationale.
    Debbie Salt: No, I'm very sane. My motive isn't as 90's as Mickey's. Mine is just good, old-fashioned revenge. You killed my son and now I kill you, and I can't think of anything more rational.

  • Gale Weathers: so what are you gonna do bonehead? just gonna sit here, wait and see who drops next?
    Gale Weathers: So what are you gonna do bonehead? Just gonna sit here, wait and see who drops next?
    Dewey Riley: well i don't know(Weathers' phone rings again), phonehead!
    Dewey Riley: Well I don't know, [Weathers' phone rings again] phonehead!

  • Debbie Salt: [threatening Sidney with a gun] Okay. So, have I covered everything? Are there any questions? Any comments? You know what, though? Who really gives a flyin' fuck, anyway? Let 'em try and track down the second possible killer! Debbie Salt doesn't exist!
    Sidney Prescott: You're as crazy as your son was!
    Debbie Salt: [looks at Sidney angrily] What did you just say? Was that a negative, disparaging remark about my son? About my Billy?
    Sidney Prescott: No, Billy was a good boy. Billy was perfect, you did a bang-up job, Mrs. Loomis.
    Debbie Salt: It's not wise to patronize me with a gun, Sidney! Randy spoke poorly of Billy and I got a little knife happy.

  • Randy Meeks: [discussing with Dewey who is the killer] Hallie.
    Dewey Riley: Sid's roommate? No, serial killers are typically white male.
    Randy Meeks: That's why it's perfect. It's sort of against the rules, but not really. Mrs. Voorhees was a terrific serial killer, and there's always room for Candyman's daughter. She's sweet, she's deadly, she's bad for your teeth.

  • Gale Weathers: what?
    Gale Weathers: What?
    Mickey: Billy's mother... nice twist ha? didn't come and see it did you?
    Mickey: Billy's mother... nice twist ha? Didn't come and see it did you?
    Gale Weathers: Jesus. it can't be I've, I've seen a lot of pictures of you..
    Gale Weathers: Jesus. It can't be I've, I've seen a lot of pictures of you.
    Sidney Prescott: this is sixty pounds and a a lot of work later..
    Sidney Prescott: This is sixty pounds, and a a lot of work later.
    Debbie Salt: you should try it, look a little tired of yourself there Gale.
    Debbie Salt: You should try it, look a little tired of yourself there Gale.

  • Maureen Evans: I hate scary movies. I should be studying. You know I got a bio due.
    Maureen Evans: I hate scary movies. I should be studying. You know I got a bio due.
    Phil Stevens: Baby, did I mention that these tickets were free?
    Phil Stevens: Baby, did I mention that these tickets were free?
    Maureen Evans: Sandra Bullock is playing right down the street.
    Maureen Evans: Sandra Bullock is playing right down the street.
    Phil Stevens: Don't nobody wanna pay $7.50 to see some Sandra Bullock shit, unless she naked.
    Maureen Evans: Oh, but you will sit through a movie called Stab?
    Maureen Evans: Oh, but you will sit through a movie called Stab?
    Phil Stevens: It's adrenaline, Maureen. It's good to be scared. It's primal.You know what I'm sayin'?
    Maureen Evans: No, I'm gonna tell you what it is, okay? It's a dumbass white movie about some dumbass white girls gettin' their white asses cut the fuck up.

  • Mickey: I'm an innocent victim.
    Sidney Prescott: You're psychotic.
    Mickey: Yeah, well. That'll be our little secret. Because people love a good trial. It's like theater. They're dying for it. And I've worked hard to give the audience what they want. See that's what Billy was good at. He knew. It's all about... execution.
    Sidney Prescott: Yeah? Well, you're forgetting one thing about Billy Loomis.
    Mickey: What's that?
    Sidney Prescott: I fucking killed him. You piece of shit!

  • Sidney Prescott: (to Mickey) You're forgeting one thing about Billy Loomis ...... I fucking killed him!
    Sidney Prescott: (to Mickey) You're forgeting one thing about Billy Loomis. I fucking killed him!

  • Phil Stevens: Scary movies are great foreplay!

  • Debbie Salt: (to Cotton) - You don't need her. Let me kill her! As long as she's alive, you're never gonna be the lead story. That's what you really want, isn't it, Cotton? If you really wanna be in the spotlight, just let me kill her...right now. Then you're the only survivor. You're the star!...(Yells) - She sent you to prison for a year! Personally, I think it's rather poetic.
    Debbie Salt: (to Cotton) You don't need her. Let me kill her! As long as she's alive, you're never gonna be the lead story. That's what you really want, isn't it, Cotton? If you really wanna be in the spotlight, just let me kill her, right now. Then you're the only survivor. You're the star! (Yells) She sent you to prison for a year! Personally, I think it's rather poetic.

  • Mickey: (disguised as the killer) - Don't you know history repeats itself?
    Mickey: (disguised as the killer) Don't you know history repeats itself?

  • Cotton Weary: Lovable and fu**ed up Sidney Prescott. Everybody's favorite little victim!!
    Cotton Weary: Lovable and fu**ed up Sidney Prescott. Everybody's favorite little victim!

  • Sidney Prescott: Hello?
    Mickey: (OR DEBBIE SALT?) Hello Sidney. Remember me?
    Debbie Salt: Hello Sidney. Remember me?
    Sidney Prescott: What do you want?
    Mickey: (OR DEBBIE SALT?) I want you. It's Showtime!
    Debbie Salt: I want you. It's Showtime!
    Sidney Prescott: Then why don't you show your face, you fu**ing coward!
    Mickey: (OR DEBBIE SALT?) My pleasure! (The killer pops out)
    Debbie Salt: My pleasure! (The killer pops out)

  • Gale Weathers: (about the killer) - Is she dead?
    Gale Weathers: (about the killer) Is she dead?
    Sidney Prescott: I don't know. They always come back.
    Cotton Weary: Woah!
    Sidney Prescott: (Sidney shoots Debbie again; in the head) - Just in case.
    Sidney Prescott: (Sidney shoots Debbie again; in the head) Just in case.

  • Sidney Prescott: Stop treating me like glass Dewey, I'm not gonna break.

  • Randy Meeks: A lot of sh*t happens at the movies, people get robbed, shot, maimed, murdered. Multiplexes are very dangerous places to be these days.

  • Mickey: Oh come on Randy, with all due respect, the killer obviously patterned himself after two serial killers who were immortalized on film.

  • Cotton Weary: Jeez Gale, you've got more lives than a cat.

  • Randy Meeks: It's deputy Dew...Woodsboro's finest! What's he doing here?
    Randy Meeks: It's deputy Dew. Woodsboro's finest! What's he doing here?

  • Joel: Look, granted, I should've read your book before I took this job, but I'm reading it now and, whoa! I just read what happened to your last camera man. The guy got gutted. Now I'm gonna do what any rational human being would do and that is to get the f**k outta here.
    Gale Weathers: First of all, he wasn't gutted; I made that part up...his throat was slashed.
    Gale Weathers: First of all, he wasn't gutted; I made that part up. His throat was slashed.
    Joel: Gale, gutted, slashed...the guy ain't in the union no more.
    Joel: Gale, gutted, slashed, the guy ain't in the union no more.

  • Sidney Prescott: You're as crazy as your son was!
    Debbie Salt: What did you just say? Was that a negative, disparaging remark about my son...About my Billy?
    Debbie Salt: What did you just say? Was that a negative, disparaging remark about my son. About my Billy?
    Sidney Prescott: No, Billy was a good boy. Billy was perfect...you did a bang-up job Mrs. Loomis.
    Sidney Prescott: No, Billy was a good boy. Billy was perfect. You did a bang-up job Mrs. Loomis.
    Debbie Salt: It's not wise to patronize me with a gun Sidney! Randy spoke poorly of Billy and I got a little knife happy.

  • Mickey: (about Derek) - He needs to realize that the 90's are no time to play hero.
    Mickey: (about Derek) He needs to realize that the 90's are no time to play hero.

  • Dewey Riley: Typically, serial killers are white male.
    Randy Meeks: That's why it's perfect! It's sort of against the rules but not really. Mrs. Voorhees was a terrific serial killer, and there's always room for Candyman's daughter. She's sweet, she's deadly, she's bad for your teeth.

  • Joel: Hey babe, wanna dance?
    Hallie: Yeah! ...with that tall, broad shoulder one over there!
    Hallie: Yeah! With that tall, broad shoulder one over there!

  • Sidney Prescott: Mrs. Loomis?
    Gale Weathers: Jesus. It can't be...I've seen pictures of you.
    Gale Weathers: What?
    Sidney Prescott: Yeah this is 60 pounds and a lot of work later.
    Mickey: BILLY'S MOTHER! Nice twist huh? Didn't see it coming, did you?
    Debbie Salt: It's called a makeover. You should try it. Look a little tired yourself there, Gale!

  • Sidney Prescott: I'm fine.
    Hallie: That's beginning to be your theme song..."I'm fine."
    Hallie: That's beginning to be your theme song, 'I'm fine.'

  • Mickey: (OR DEBBIE SALT?) Have you ever felt a knife cut through human flesh and scrape the bone beneath?
    Mickey: Have you ever felt a knife cut through human flesh and scrape the bone beneath?

  • Sorority Sister Murphy: Hey Sid, how are you holding up?
    Sidney Prescott: I'm coping.
    Sorority Sister Murphy: This is weird isn't it, to think this fuss is all because of you. I mean, not directly, but in some six degrees of Kevin Bacon-way.

  • Mickey: Just wait until the trial. It is gonna rock!
    Debbie Salt: Oh, Mickey, there's not going to be a trial. (Shoots Mickey)

  • Derek: I am gonna fu**ing kill you! FU**ING KILL YOU! You are dead! DEAD!

  • Randy Meeks: There are certain rules that one must abide by in order to create a successful sequel. Number one: the body count is always bigger. Number two: the death scenes are always much more elaborate - more blood, more gore - "carnage candy". And number three: never, ever, under any circumstances, assume the killer is dead.
    Randy Meeks: There are certain rules that one must abide by in order to create a successful sequel. Number one: the body count is always bigger. Number two: the death scenes are always much more elaborate - more blood, more gore - 'carnage candy'. And number three: never, ever, under any circumstances, assume the killer is dead.

  • Randy Meeks: Mickey, the freaky Tarantino film student. But if he's a suspect, so am I. Let's move on.
    Dewey Riley: Wait a minute. Maybe you are a suspect.
    Randy Meeks: Well if I'm a suspect, you're a suspect.
    Dewey Riley: Good point. Okay, let's move on...
    Dewey Riley: Good point. Okay, let's move on.

  • Mickey: Empire Strikes Back. Better story, improved effects.
    Randy Meeks: Not a sequel, part of a trilogy, completely planned.

  • Maureen Evans: Why is she naked? What has that got to do with the plot; her being butt ass naked?
    Phil Stevens: I don't know about the plot but I'm getting a stiffy.

  • Randy Meeks: Oh yeah? We'll let's re-direct the moment Mr. "I'm So Original". Where's your motivation? Huh? Why copy yourself off of two high school loser ass di*kheads? Stu was a pussy ass wet rag...And Billy Loomis? Billy Loomis, what the f**k? Jesus! Talk about a rat looking homo repressed momma's boy! Why not set your goals higher huh? You wanna be one of the big boys! Huh? Manson, Bundy, O.J.
    Randy Meeks: Oh yeah? We'll let's re-direct the moment Mr. 'I'm So Original'. Where's your motivation? Huh? Why copy yourself off of two high school loser ass di*kheads? Stu was a pussy ass wet rag. And Billy Loomis? Billy Loomis, what the f**k? Jesus! Talk about a rat looking homo repressed momma's boy! Why not set your goals higher huh? You wanna be one of the big boys! Huh? Manson, Bundy, O.J.

  • Mickey: (OR DEBBIE SALT?) - Why are you even here Randy? You'll never be the leading man.
    Mickey: Why are you even here Randy? You'll never be the leading man.
    Randy Meeks: Fuuuuuuu*k you!
    Randy Meeks: Fu*k you!
    Mickey: (OR DEBBIE SALT?) No matter how hard you try you'll never be the hero and you'll never ever get the girl.
    Mickey: No matter how hard you try you'll never be the hero and you'll never ever get the girl.

  • Joel: Brothers don't last long in situations like this.

  • Cici Cooper: Drink with your brains...that's our motto.
    Cici Cooper: Drink with your brains. That's our motto.

  • Mickey: The Delta Lambdas are the biggest bunch of fu**ing...
    Hallie: Hey! I'm pledging Delta Lambda, thank you!

  • Gale Weathers: Do you have any comments?
    Sidney Prescott: You bitch!
    Gale Weathers: Oh Sidney share with us please.
    Sidney Prescott: (hits Gale in the face) - I'll share with you!
    Sidney Prescott: (hits Gale in the face) I'll share with you!
    Hallie: Did you get that on film?!
    Joel: (mimicking Hallie's voice) - Yes, I got that on film!
    Joel: (mimicking Hallie's voice) Yes, I got that on film!

  • Maureen Evans: Bitch, hang up the phone and star-69 his ass!

  • Randy Meeks: (when asked how he'd make a horror movie different?) - ...I'd let the geek get the girl.
    Randy Meeks: (when asked how he'd make a horror movie different?) I'd let the geek get the girl.

  • Sidney Prescott: Hot flash Cory...prank calls are a criminal offense prosecuted under penal code 653M. (Caller hangs up) - Hope you enjoyed the movie.
    Sidney Prescott: Prank calls are a criminal offense prosecuted under penal code 653M. (Caller hangs up) Hope you enjoyed the movie.

  • Maureen Evans: Give me some money, I need to get popcorn.
    Phil Stevens: You got money.
    Maureen Evans: I got my money...I asked for your money!
    Maureen Evans: I got my money. I asked for your money!

  • Dewey Riley: How do you know that my dimwitted inexperience isn't merely a subtle form of manipulation, used to lower people's expectations, thereby enhancing my ability to effectively maneuver within any given situation?

  • Cici Cooper: Who are you calling for?
    Mickey: (OR DEBBIE SALT?): What if I said you?
    Mickey: What if I said you?
    Cici Cooper: What if I said goodbye?
    Mickey: (OR DEBBIE SALT?): Why would you want to do that?
    Mickey: Why would you want to do that?
    Cici Cooper: Why do you always answer a question with a question?
    Mickey: (OR DEBBIE SALT?): I'm inquisitive.
    Mickey: I'm inquisitive.
    Cici Cooper: Yeah, and I'm impatient. Look, do you wanna leave a message for somebody?
    Mickey: (OR DEBBIE SALT?): Do you want to die tonight, Cici?
    Mickey: Do you want to die tonight, Cici?

  • Cotton Weary: Look, it's not like we're getting paid here also with what I've got going the side with a 900 number. Look Sid, I understand that you don't like the press, I respect that but Sid, (Cotton laughs psychotically), it's Diane Sawyer! Hello!
    Sidney Prescott: Look, between the movie and the book, people know the truth. There's already been enough exposure. Why would you want anymore exposure?
    Cotton Weary: Well, I don't know Sid, cause maybe I fu**ing deserve a little exposure! Come Sid, I mean, you drag my name through the mud, everyone thinks I am some kind of psycho, and all I am asking is for one little fu**ing Diane Sawyer interview. Now, I don't think I am being unreasonable.

  • Debbie Salt: Please Miss Weathers; it would just be such an honor if I could get a quote from you for my story.
    Gale Weathers: All right. Begin quote.
    Debbie Salt: Great.
    Gale Weathers: Your flattering remarks are both desperate and obvious. End quote!

  • Randy Meeks: Sorry. So, what's your favorite scary movie? The Dorm that Dripped Blood, The House on Sorority Row, Graduation Day?

  • Gale Weathers: So I am heading down to Admissions to do some legwork, you game?
    Dewey Riley: I'm not here to write a book Miss Weathers, I'm here to help Sid.
    Gale Weathers: I wanna help her too, and help myself, of course. Come on Dewey, smile for me once, please!
    Dewey Riley: I'll smile when I catch the killer.

  • Maureen Evans: Listen I read my Entertainment Weekly...I know my sh*t!
    Maureen Evans: Listen, I read my Entertainment Weekly. I know my sh*t!

  • Joel: Yeah, but I want to report the news; I don't want to be the news.

  • Gale Weathers: It's happening again, isn't it?
    Dewey Riley: You'd love that, wouldn't you? Better hurry Gale, might get scooped.

  • Gale Weathers: I feel bad Dewey, I feel really bad! I never say that because I never feel bad about anything, but I feel bad now.
    Dewey Riley: Is this just another brilliant Gale Weathers performance?
    Gale Weathers: There are no cameras here. I just wanna find this fu**er! I really do.

  • Randy Meeks: Sidney, look, it's Gale Weathers.
    Sidney Prescott: What?
    Randy Meeks: Star of the Gale Weathers press conference...Author of the press conference starring Gale Weathers. Soon to be a major motion picture starring Gale Weathers!
    Randy Meeks: Star of the Gale Weathers press conference. Author of the press conference starring Gale Weathers. Soon to be a major motion picture starring Gale Weathers!

  • Randy Meeks: I cannot believe it. They get Tori Spelling to play Sid, and they cast Joe Blow Nobody to play me. At least you get David Schwimmer. I get the guy who drove the stagecoach for one episode of Dr. Quinn!

  • Dewey Riley: When did she start smoking?
    Randy Meeks: Ever since those nude pictures on the internet.
    Gale Weathers: It was just my head...it was Jennifer Aniston's body!
    Gale Weathers: It was just my head. It was Jennifer Aniston's body!

  • Dewey Riley: Look, Gale's no killer.
    Randy Meeks: Okay, all right then, but if she's not a killer, she's a target.

  • Hallie: I like the little furry things.
    Mickey: Ewoks...they blow.
    Mickey: Ewoks, they blow.

  • Dewey Riley: Page 41, "Deputy Dewey oozed with inexperience."
    Dewey Riley: Page 41, 'Deputy Dewey oozed with inexperience.'

  • Sorority Sister Murphy: HI...No, I really mean that...hi!
    Sorority Sister Murphy: Hi. No, I really mean that, hi!

  • Mickey: It's a perfect example of life imitating art imitating life.

  • Maureen Evans: (to the disguised killer next to her) - See, if that was me, I'd be running!
    Maureen Evans: (to the disguised killer next to her) See, if that was me, I'd be running!

  • Sidney Prescott: Yeah? Well, you're forgetting one thing about Billy Loomis.
    Mickey: What's that?
    Sidney Prescott: I fu**ing killed him!

  • Dewey Riley: (to Gale) - And one more thing...Nice streaks!
    Dewey Riley: (to Gale) And one more thing. Nice streaks!

  • Mickey: You should really deal with your trust issues Sid. I mean, poor Derek. He's completely innocent and such a nice boy too. He's bright and funny and handsome...Decent singing voice. And he was going to be a doctor. This is just the kind of boy you'd like to take home to mom...If you had a mom.
    Mickey: You should really deal with your trust issues Sid. I mean, poor Derek. He's completely innocent and such a nice boy too. He's bright and funny and handsome, decent singing voice. And he was going to be a doctor. This is just the kind of boy you'd like to take home to mom. If you had a mom.
    Sidney Prescott: F**k you!
    Mickey: Oh, so vulgar! Did Billy let you talk to him this way?
    Sidney Prescott: Billy was a sick f**k just like you!
    Mickey: No. Billy was a sick f**k who tried to get away with it. Mickey is a sick f**k who wants to get caught, yeah! You see I got my whole defense planned out. I'm gonna blame the movies...Pretty cool huh? It hasn't been done before. You see, this is just the beginning, a prelude to the trial. Cause see that's where the real fun is 'cause these days it's all about the trial. Can you see it; the effects of cinema violence on society? I'll get Dershowitz or Cochran to represent me...Bob Dole on the witness stand in my defense! Hell the Christian Coalition will pay my legal fees...It's air tight Sid. I'm an innocent victim.
    Mickey: No. Billy was a sick f**k who tried to get away with it. Mickey is a sick f**k who wants to get caught, yeah! You see I got my whole defense planned out. I'm gonna blame the movies...Pretty cool huh? It hasn't been done before. You see, this is just the beginning, a prelude to the trial. Cause see that's where the real fun is 'cause these days it's all about the trial. Can you see it; the effects of cinema violence on society? I'll get Dershowitz or Cochran to represent me, Bob Dole on the witness stand in my defense! Hell the Christian Coalition will pay my legal fees. It's air tight Sid. I'm an innocent victim.
    Sidney Prescott: You're a psychotic.
    Mickey: Yeah, well. Shhh...That'll be our little secret. Cause people love a good trial. It's like theater. They're dying for it. And I've worked hard to give the audience what they want. See that's what Billy was good at. He knew...It's all about...execution.
    Mickey: Yeah, well. Shhh. That'll be our little secret. Cause people love a good trial. It's like theater. They're dying for it. And I've worked hard to give the audience what they want. See that's what Billy was good at. He knew, It's all about execution.

  • Joel: I'm gonna get some donuts, some Prozac; see if I can find some crack, Special K, X...not Malcolm, and I'll be back when y'all start talking about something a little more "Saved By The Bell"-ish!
    Joel: I'm gonna get some donuts, some Prozac, see if I can find some crack, Special K, X, not Malcolm, and I'll be back when y'all start talking about something a little more 'Saved By The Bell-ish'!

  • Sidney Prescott: I want to know who it is.
    Hallie: No, no, Sid!
    Sidney Prescott: I'm going back!
    Hallie: Stupid people go back! Smart people run! We're smart people, so we should just get the f**k outta here!

  • Randy Meeks: Get a room!

  • Debbie Salt: Oh! Mickey was a good boy, but my God! That whole "Blame-the-movies" motive...Did you buy that for one second? The poor boy was completely out of his mind.
    Debbie Salt: Oh! Mickey was a good boy, but my God! That whole 'Blame-the-movies' motive. Did you buy that for one second? The poor boy was completely out of his mind.
    Sidney Prescott: And you're not?
    Debbie Salt: No. I'm very sane. My motive isn't as 90's as Mickey's. Mine is just good, old-fashioned revenge. You killed my son! And now I kill you, and I can't think of anything more rational!
    Sidney Prescott: You're never gonna get away with this.
    Debbie Salt: Oh, of course I will! Everything's traceable back to Mickey. Including the cop gun he used to kill everybody. But let's just suppose that you had gotten hold of the other cop's gun. And you chased Mickey, and there was a big shoot-out, and a big scuffle. And you shot Mickey! Killed Mickey dead! But not before he got off one shot at you! Okay. So, have I covered everything? Are there any questions...Any comments? You know what, though? Who gives a flying f**k, anyway? Let them try and track down the second possible killer! Debbie Salt doesn't exist!
    Debbie Salt: Oh, of course I will! Everything's traceable back to Mickey. Including the cop gun he used to kill everybody. But let's just suppose that you had gotten hold of the other cop's gun. And you chased Mickey, and there was a big shoot-out, and a big scuffle. And you shot Mickey! Killed Mickey dead! But not before he got off one shot at you! Okay. So, have I covered everything? Are there any questions. Any comments? You know what, though? Who gives a flying f**k, anyway? Let them try and track down the second possible killer! Debbie Salt doesn't exist!

  • Debbie Salt: (after shooting Mickey) - Two birds, one stone.
    Debbie Salt: (after shooting Mickey) Two birds, one stone.

  • Gale Weathers: So what do you want to do, bonehead? Just sit around and wait to see who drops next?
    Dewey Riley: I don't know...phonehead!
    Dewey Riley: I don't know, phonehead!

  • Maureen Evans: Sandra Bullock is playing right down the street.
    Phil Stevens: Now why do you wanna pay 7.50 to see some Sandra Bullock sh*t...unless she's naked.
    Phil Stevens: Now why do you wanna pay 7.50 to see some Sandra Bullock sh*t, unless she's naked.

  • Gale Weathers: Look, local woman! I know you hold me up as your career template and that it gives you some sort of charge to challenge me, but give it a rest.

  • Mickey: (OR DEBBIE SALT?) ...don't forget to set the alarm!!!
    Mickey: Don't forget to set the alarm!

  • Cotton Weary: I don't know about homicide, but you've definitely got me for raising my voice in a public library.

  • Gale Weathers: Hey, you'd better check your conscience at the door sweetie. I'm not here to be loved.

  • Mickey: (OR DEBBIE SALT?) - What's your favorite scary movie?
    Mickey: What's your favorite scary movie?
    Randy Meeks: Showgirls...absolutely frightening.
    Randy Meeks: Showgirls. Absolutely frightening.

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