Thomas Haden Church

Thomas Haden Church

  • Highest Rated: 97% Sideways (2004)
  • Lowest Rated: 6% All About Steve (2009)
  • Birthday: Jun 17, 1960
  • Birthplace: El Paso, Texas, USA
  • By the time actor Thomas Haden Church earned an Oscar nomination for his unforgettable supporting role as a womanizing, has-been actor heading out on one last fling before tying the knot in director Alexander Payne's critically acclaimed road drama Sideways (2004), many film and television viewers may have assumed (and not without merit) that the former Wings star had all but abandoned his career in front of the cameras. It had, after all, been nearly a decade since Church had endeared himself to television viewers as lovably dunderheaded mechanic Lowell Mather on the aforementioned hit television series, and though he did remain fairly active onscreen after Wings went off the air in 1995, his career took something of a back seat to his familial commitments and life on his Texas cattle ranch. Coupled with a conscious decision to move away from acting and try his talents behind the camera, Church's fading devotion to acting still made his nomination at the 2005 Oscars feel like something of a comeback even though he had remained fairly active in show business all along. A Texas native whose early career included a stint as a radio disc jockey and voice-over announcer, Church first got a taste for acting with an appearance in the independent feature Gypsy Angels, and a move to Los Angeles followed shortly thereafter. It didn't take long for the handsome, young aspiring actor to land his defining role in Wings, and aside from supporting roles in the features Tombstone and Tales From the Crypt: Demon Knight, it was his role in Wings and the subsequent television series Ned and Stacey for which he was best remembered for some time. Following the cancellation of Ned and Stacey, Church turned his attention primarily to feature films with supporting roles in One Night Stand, 3000 Miles to Graceland, Monkeybone, and Lone Star State of Mind serving to at least pay the bills. Dejected by a somewhat stifled acting career and determined to spend more time with his wife and children, Church opted to step behind the scenes to write and direct the independent comedy Rolling Kansas. A lighthearted road movie concerning a trio of brothers' quest to find a seemingly-mythical marijuana field in the sprawling plains of Kansas, Rolling Kansas made a brief appearance at the 2003 Sundance Film Festival before making its debut on Comedy Central the following year. Just when it seemed that the rest of Church's onscreen career may have been relegated to appearances in George of the Jungle sequels, acclaimed independent filmmaker Payne had recalled his auditions for his previous two films, Election and About Schmidt. Though Church hadn't quite made the cut on either of those films, Payne had taken note of his talent and thought the former Wings star the perfect candidate to play a formerly popular television star and down-on-his-luck actor having trouble adjusting to the prospect of marriage in Payne's upcoming comedy drama Sideways. Cast opposite American Splendor's Paul Giamatti, Church's alternately desperate and sad performance proved the heart of the film many considered to be the year's -- not to mention director Payne's -- best. The movie earned Church an Oscar nomination for Best Supporting Actor. He followed up that success with appearances in the comedy Idiocracy and the western Broken Trail opposite Robert Duvall. In 2007 he was cast as one of the two-villains in Spider-Man 3, and the year after that he starred in the biting drama Smart People. His deep, recognizable voice led him to voiceover work in a variety of projects such as Aliens in the Attic, Charlotte's Web, and Over the Hedge. In 2010 he had a part in the sleeper hit Easy A, and he played Matt Damon's brother in Cameron Crowe's We Bought a Zoo. In 2012 he was cast in the Disney flop John Carter.

Photos

Highest Rated Movies

Filmography

Movies

Rating

Title

Credit

Box
Office

Year

95% The Peanut Butter Falcon The Salt Water Redneck 2019
17% Hellboy Lobster Johnson 2019
54% Crash Pad Grady 2017
38% Cardboard Boxer Willie Executive Producer 2016
31% Daddy's Home Leo 2015
38% Max Ray $26.8M 2015
77% Lucky Them Charlie 2014
83% Whitewash Bruce Landry 2014
49% Heaven Is for Real Jay Wilkins 2014
79% Killer Joe Ansel Smith $1.9M 2012
52% John Carter Tal Hajus $73.1M 2012
64% We Bought a Zoo Duncan Mee $72.8M 2011
44% Another Happy Day Paul $9K 2011
85% Easy A Mr. Griffith $58.5M 2010
38% Don McKay Don McKay Executive Producer 2010
6% All About Steve Hartman Hughes $33.9M 2009
32% Aliens in the Attic Tazer $25M 2009
41% Imagine That Johnny Whitefeather $16.1M 2009
49% Smart People Chuck Wetherhold $9.5M 2008
63% Spider-Man 3 Flint Marko/Sandman $336.6M 2007
78% Charlotte's Web Brooks $82.2M 2006
76% Idiocracy Brawndo CEO $0.4M 2006
No Score Yet Broken Trail Tom Harte 2006
75% Over the Hedge Dwayne $155.1M 2006
No Score Yet Serial Killing 101 Vince Grimaldi 2004
53% Spanglish Mike the Realtor $42.1M 2004
97% Sideways Jack $71.5M 2004
No Score Yet Rolling Kansas Screenwriter Director 2004
17% George Of The Jungle 2 Lyle Van de Groot 2003
33% The Badge David 2002
No Score Yet Lone Star State of Mind Killer 2002
14% 3000 Miles to Graceland Federal Marshal Quigley $15.4M 2001
47% The Specials The Strobe 2000
No Score Yet Susan's Plan Dr. Stillman 2000
29% Free Money Larry 1999
No Score Yet Mr. Murder Actor 1998
32% One Night Stand Don 1997
57% George of the Jungle Lyle Van de Groot 1997
38% Tales from the Crypt Presents: Demon Knight Roach 1995
73% Tombstone Billy Clanton 1993

TV

Rating

Title

Credit

Year

77% Divorce
2016
Robert
  • 2019
  • 2018
  • 2016
No Score Yet The Late Show With Stephen Colbert
2015
Guest
  • 2018
No Score Yet Jimmy Kimmel Live
2003
Guest
  • 2018
  • 2012
  • 2011
No Score Yet Last Call With Carson Daly
2007
Guest
  • 2016
No Score Yet Late Show With David Letterman
1993-2015
Guest
  • 2014
No Score Yet The Tonight Show With Jay Leno
1992-2014
Guest
  • 2014
  • 2011
  • 2010
  • 2006
  • 2005
No Score Yet Regular Show
2010-2018
Voice
  • 2012
No Score Yet Conan
2010
Guest
  • 2011
  • 2010
No Score Yet The Ellen DeGeneres Show
2003
Guest
  • 2008
64% Ned and Stacey
1995-1997
Ned Dorsey
  • 1997
  • 1996
  • 1995
No Score Yet Wings
1990-1997
Lowell Mather
  • 1995
  • 1994
  • 1993
  • 1992
  • 1991
  • 1990
No Score Yet Cheers
1982-1993
Guest Gordie Brown
  • 1989

QUOTES FROM Thomas Haden Church CHARACTERS

Charlie
It lights up your face so you look like the devil's concubine.
"Killer" Joe Cooper
I mean all she did was suck his cock and try and steal your money. It could have been worse.
Ansel
How?
"Killer" Joe Cooper
Well... no, I suppose that's about as bad as it gets.
Ansel
Hey Chris. Why don't you do us all a big favour and just go kill yourself?
Ansel
I got him Joe! Fucking kill him!
Mr. Griffith
I don't know what your generation's fascination is with documenting your every thought... but I can assure you, they're not all diamonds. "Roman is having an OK day, and bought a Coke Zero at the gas station. Raise the roof." Who gives a rat's ass?
Mr. Griffith
I don't know what your generation's fascination is with documenting your every thought... but I can assure you, they're not all diamonds. 'Roman is having an OK day, and bought a Coke Zero at the gas station. Raise the roof.' Who gives a rat's ass?
"Killer" Joe Cooper
Hey! What do you think?
Ansel
I don't!
"Killer" Joe Cooper
Where you aware of this Ansel?
Ansel
I'm never aware...
Ansel
What fat kid?
"Killer" Joe Cooper
I mean, she did was suck his cock and try to steal your money.
"Killer" Joe Cooper
I mean all she did was suck his cock and try and steal your money. It could have been worse.
"Killer" Joe Cooper
it could have been worse.
Ansel Smith
How?
Ansel
How?
"Killer" Joe Cooper
Well... No, I suppose that´s about bad as it gets.
"Killer" Joe Cooper
Well...
"Killer" Joe Cooper
No, I suppose tha´s about bad as it gets.
Duncan Mee
Dump the animals, keep Kelly. THAT's true joy!
Mr. Griffith
Rhiannon, Olive, go hit the book. They don't hit back. Also, hugs not drugs. Mess with the bull, get the horns. And any other cliches you can come up with.
Stephanie
Miles: I´m a thumbprint on the window of a skyscraper. I´m a smudge of excrement on a tissue surging out to sea with a million tons of raw sewage. Jack: See? rigth there... that's beautiful. A smudge of excrement...I could never write that. M: Neither could I actually, I think it's Bukowsi.
Jack Lapate
See? rigth there... that's beautiful. A smudge of excrement... I could never write that.
Duncan Mee
If you're doing something for the right reasons, nothing can stop you.
Duncan Mee
I like the animals... but I love the humans.
Gladys
That's the...
Dwayne
The Depelter Turbo! Prepare for a lot of stinging!
Dwayne
Dwayne LaFontant is here!
Bill Clanton
Hah! Drunk piano player...you're so drunk you can't hit nothing. In fact - you're probably seeing double. [draws knife]
Bill Clanton
Why, it's the drunk piano player. You're so drunk, you can't hit nothin'. In fact, you're probably seeing double. [Billy Clanton draws a knife]
Doc Holliday
[draws a second pistol] I have two guns...one for each of you.
Doc Holliday
[takes out a second gun] I have two guns, one for each of ya.
Jack Lapate
Youre a bad, bad, girl Stephanie......
Jack Lapate
Youre a bad, bad, girl Stephanie.
Stephanie
I know and I need to be spanked
Stephanie
I know and I need to be spanked.
Miles Raymond
It tastes like the back of a fucking L.A. school bus. Now they probably didn't de-stem, hoping for some semblance of concentration, crushed it up with leaves and mice, and then wound up with this rancid tar and turpentine bullshit. Fuckin' Raid.
Jack Lapate
Tastes pretty good to me.
Jack Lapate
Listen, man. Cammi gets off in an hour, so I was thinking I'd just hang around and have a drink, and make sure she gets home safe.
Jack Lapate
If they want to drink Merlot, we're drinking Merlot.
Miles Raymond
No, if anyone orders Merlot, I'm leaving. I am NOT drinking any fucking Merlot!
Bill Clanton
You're so drunk, you're probably seeing double...
Doc Holliday
I have two guns...one for each of ya