Ben Stiller

Ben Stiller

  • Highest Rated: 93% The Meyerowitz Stories (New and Selected) (2017)
  • Lowest Rated: 0% The Suburbans (1999)
  • Birthday: Nov 30, 1965
  • Birthplace: New York, New York, USA
  • As the son of comedians Jerry Stiller and Anne Meara Ben Stiller's decision to establish himself as a comic writer and actor surprised almost no one.Born in New York City on November 30, 1965, Stiller began to shoot his own comic films from the age of ten. After high-school graduation, Stiller attended UCLA and landed bit parts in several features, notably the Steven Spielberg-directed, Tom Stoppard and Menno Meyjes-scripted, late 1987 opus Empire of the Sun.Meanwhile, Stiller continued to turn out comedy shorts, including the 30-minute Elvis Stories (1989), a spoof of obsessive Elvis fans featuring an already-established John Cusack. One of Stiller's shorts, a Tom Cruise parody called The Hustler of Money, won him a spot as a writer and player on Saturday Night Live in 1989. His stint on the show was short-lived, but led to his own eponymous series, The Ben Stiller Show, first on MTV (1990) and later on Fox (1992-1993). The program failed to draw a substantial audience, and folded within a couple of months on each network, but Stiller netted an Emmy for comedy writing in 1993.The following year, Stiller debuted as a feature film director with the twentysomething angst romcom Reality Bites (1994), in which he also starred alongside Winona Ryder and a memorably grungy Ethan Hawke. The film was a relative critical and commercial success and scored with Gen-Xers; unfortunately, Stiller's next directorial effort, 1996's The Cable Guy failed to register with critics and audiences. After a small part as nursing-home orderly Hal in the Adam Sandler comedy Happy Gilmore (1996), Stiller rebounded with a starring role in David O. Russell's Flirting With Disaster (1996). The relatively positive reception afforded to that comedy helped to balance out the relative failure of Stiller's other film that year, If Lucy Fell. It was not until two years later, however, that Stiller truly stepped into the limelight. Thanks to starring roles in three wildly, wickedly different films, he emerged as an actor of versatility, equally adept at playing sensitive nice guys and malevolent hellraisers. In the smash gross-out comedy There's Something About Mary (1998), Stiller appeared as the former type, making comic history for outrageous sight gags that involved misplaced bodily fluids and mangled genitalia. That same summer, Stiller did time as a gleefully adulterous theatrical instructor in Neil LaBute's jet-black evisceration of contemporary sexual mores, Your Friends and Neighbors. Finally, Stiller starred in the intensely graphic and disturbing addiction drama Permanent Midnight, earning critical acclaim for his portrayal of writer-cum-heroin addict Jerry Stahl -- a personal friend of the Stiller family from Stahl's days scripting the TV series ALF. Now fully capable of holding his own in Hollywood, with the license to prove it, Stiller starred alongside William H. Macy, Paul Reubens, Hank Azaria, and pal Janeane Garofalo in the fantasy comedy Mystery Men (1999) as the leader of a group of unconventional superheroes. Stiller also landed a supporting role in The Suburbans, a comedy about the former members of a defunct new wave band. The following year, Stiller starred as a rabbi smitten with the same woman as his best friend, a Catholic priest (Edward Norton), in the well-received romantic comedy Keeping the Faith (2000), which Norton also co-produced and directed. Stiller found his widest audience up to that point, however, with the Jay Roach-directed madcap comedy Meet the Parents. As the tale of a nutty father-in-law to be (Robert De Niro) who wreaks unchecked havoc on his daughter's intended (Stiller) via covert CIA operations and incessant interrogation, this disastrously humorous tale of electrical interference gone wild scored with ticket-buyers and qualified as the top box-office draw during the holiday season of 2000.In the autumn of 2001, Stiller brought one of his most popular MTV Video Music Awards incarnations to the big screen in the ou

Photos

Highest Rated Movies

Filmography

Movies

Rating

Title

Credit

Box
Office

Year

No Score Yet Mais Um Executive Producer 2019
80% Alex Strangelove Producer Executive Producer 2018
93% The Meyerowitz Stories (New and Selected) Actor 2017
79% Brad's Status Brad Sloan $2.1M 2017
39% Why Him? Producer $60.4M 2016
22% Zoolander 2 Derek Zoolander Producer Director Screenwriter $29.8M 2016
67% Sweet Micky For President Actor 2015
33% Being Canadian Actor 2015
84% While We're Young Josh $7.1M 2015
47% Night at the Museum: Secret of the Tomb Larry Daley $81.6M 2014
79% Harmontown Actor 2014
51% The Secret Life Of Walter Mitty Director Walter Mitty Producer $33.3M 2013
No Score Yet Rentaghost Actor 2013
No Score Yet Madly Madagascar Alex 2013
17% The Watch Evan $34.2M 2012
79% Madagascar 3: Europe's Most Wanted Alex $216.4M 2012
No Score Yet Burning Love Producer 2012
67% Tower Heist Josh Kovacs $78.1M 2011
41% The Big Year Producer Executive Producer $7.2M 2011
44% 30 Minutes or Less Producer $37.2M 2011
88% Submarine Executive Producer $0.5M 2011
No Score Yet Dreamworks Holiday Classics Actor 2011
9% Little Fockers Greg Focker $148.4M 2010
72% Megamind Bernard Executive Producer $148.3M 2010
53% I'm Still Here Actor $0.5M 2010
76% Greenberg Roger Greenberg $2.3M 2010
No Score Yet Nick Nolte: No Exit Actor 2009
No Score Yet Merry Madagascar Actor 2009
18% The Marc Pease Experience Jon Gribble 2009
45% Night at the Museum 2: Battle of the Smithsonian Larry Daley $177.2M 2009
90% The Boys: The Sherman Brothers' Story Executive Producer 2009
64% Madagascar: Escape 2 Africa Alex $180M 2008
81% Tropic Thunder Screenwriter Director Speedman Producer $110.5M 2008
No Score Yet Rain of Madness Tugg Speedman 2008
48% The Ruins Executive Producer Producer $17.5M 2008
29% The Heartbreak Kid Eddie Cantrow $36.8M 2007
70% Blades of Glory Producer $118.2M 2007
43% Night at the Museum Larry Daley $249.4M 2006
53% Tenacious D in The Pick of Destiny Guitar Store Guy Executive Producer $8.2M 2006
26% School for Scoundrels Lonnie $17.8M 2006
No Score Yet Comedy Central Roast of William Shatner Actor 2006
No Score Yet Danny Roane: First Time Director Himself 2006
54% Madagascar Alex $193.2M 2005
No Score Yet All Aboard The Crazy Train Actor 2005
No Score Yet Sledge: The Story of Frank Sledge Actor 2004
39% Meet the Fockers Greg Focker $279.2M 2004
70% Dodgeball - A True Underdog Story Producer White Goodman $114.2M 2004
8% Envy Tim Dingman $12.2M 2004
No Score Yet Sesame Street: What's the Name of That Song Actor 2004
62% Starsky & Hutch Executive Producer David Starsky $87.2M 2004
26% Along Came Polly Reuben Feffer $87.9M 2004
35% Duplex Alex Rose Producer 2003
57% Pauly Shore Is Dead Himself 2003
No Score Yet Robbie the Reindeer in Hooves of Fire and the Legend of the Lost Tribe Robbie the Reindeer [US Version] 2002
No Score Yet Prehistoric Planet: The Complete Dino Dynasty Actor 2002
39% Black and White Mark Clear 2002
46% Orange County Firefighter (uncredited) $41.1M 2002
80% The Royal Tenenbaums Chas Tenenbaum $52.4M 2002
71% Run Ronnie Run! Himself 2002
60% The Independent Cop 2001
64% Zoolander Screenwriter Producer Director Derek Zoolander $44.8M 2001
84% Meet the Parents Greg Focker $164.5M 2000
69% Keeping the Faith Rabbi Jake Schram 2000
0% The Suburbans Jay Rose 1999
60% Mystery Men Mr. Furious (Roy) 1999
58% Permanent Midnight Jerry Stahl 1998
77% Your Friends & Neighbors Jerry 1998
83% There's Something About Mary Ted Stroehmann 1998
No Score Yet Derek Zoolander University Actor 1997
64% Zero Effect Steve Arlo 1997
No Score Yet Derek Zoolander: Male Model Actor 1996
53% The Cable Guy Sam Sweet Director 1996
87% Flirting With Disaster Mel Coplin 1996
18% If Lucy Fell Bwick Elias 1996
61% Happy Gilmore Hal L. 1996
No Score Yet For Better or Worse Actor 1996
29% Heavyweights Tony Perkis 1995
66% Reality Bites Director Michael Grates 1993
No Score Yet Highway to Hell Pluto's Cook/Attila the Hun 1991
No Score Yet Working Trash Freddy Novak 1990
No Score Yet Stella Jim Uptegrove 1990
56% Next of Kin Lawrence Isabella 1989
No Score Yet That's Adequate Chip Lane 1989
No Score Yet Elvis Stories Director Bruce 1989
0% Fresh Horses Tipton 1988
75% Empire of the Sun Dainty 1987
No Score Yet Hot Pursuit Chris Honeywell 1987
No Score Yet Saturday Night Live - The Best of Jon Lovitz Actor 1985

TV

Rating

Title

Credit

Year

100% Desus & Mero
2019
Guest
  • 2019
73% In the Dark
2019
Executive Producer
  • 2019
89% Escape at Dannemora
2018
Executive Producer Director
  • 2019
  • 2018
No Score Yet The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon
2014
Guest
  • 2019
  • 2017
  • 2015
  • 2014
No Score Yet Jimmy Kimmel Live
2003
Guest
  • 2019
  • 2018
  • 2012
No Score Yet The Late Show With Stephen Colbert
2015
Guest
  • 2018
  • 2016
75% Another Period
2015-2018
Producer Executive Producer Charles Ponzi
  • 2018
  • 2016
  • 2015
No Score Yet Today
2017
Guest
  • 2017
38% Maya & Marty
2016
Appearing
  • 2016
No Score Yet Watch What Happens Live With Andy Cohen
2009
Guest
  • 2016
No Score Yet StarTalk
2015
Guest
  • 2016
  • 2015
No Score Yet Charlie Rose
2013-2017
Guest
  • 2016
  • 2014
No Score Yet The Meltdown With Jonah and Kumail
2014-2016
Producer Executive Producer
  • 2016
  • 2015
  • 2014
No Score Yet The Graham Norton Show
2007
Guest
  • 2016
  • 2014
  • 2013
73% Big Time in Hollywood, FL
2015
Producer Executive Producer Jimmy
  • 2015
No Score Yet Late Night With Seth Meyers
2014
Guest
  • 2015
No Score Yet Running Wild With Bear Grylls
2014
Appearing
  • 2014
100% The Birthday Boys
2013-2014
Producer Executive Producer Guest
  • 2014
  • 2013
No Score Yet Late Show With David Letterman
1993-2015
Guest
  • 2014
  • 2013
  • 2011
No Score Yet Burning Love
2012-2013
Executive Producer
  • 2013
No Score Yet Chelsea Lately
2007-2014
Guest
  • 2013
No Score Yet Colbert Report
2005-2014
Guest
  • 2013
No Score Yet Inside Comedy
2012-2015
Guest
  • 2013
No Score Yet Conan
2010
Guest
  • 2013
  • 2012
  • 2011
No Score Yet The Ellen DeGeneres Show
2003
Guest
  • 2013
  • 2009
  • 2007
  • 2005
No Score Yet The Tonight Show With Jay Leno
1992-2014
Guest
  • 2012
  • 2004
  • 2002
No Score Yet Saturday Night Live
1975
Host Guest
  • 2011
  • 1998
  • 1989
  • 1988
No Score Yet Phineas and Ferb
2007-2015
Voice
  • 2010
95% Tim and Eric Awesome Show Great Job!
2007-2010
Performer
  • 2010
No Score Yet Late Night With Jimmy Fallon
2009-2014
Guest
  • 2010
  • 2009
No Score Yet The Daily Show With Jon Stewart
1999-2015
Guest
  • 2010
  • 2008
  • 2006
72% American Idol
2002-2016
Appearing
  • 2009
  • 2008
  • 2007
No Score Yet The Henry Rollins Show
2006-2007
Guest
  • 2007
89% Extras
2005-2007
Guest Himself
  • 2005
75% Arrested Development
2003
Tony Wonder
  • 2005
  • 2004
92% Curb Your Enthusiasm
2000-2017
Himself
  • 2004
No Score Yet King of the Hill
1997-2010
Voice
  • 2004
No Score Yet Lass es, Larry!
2000-2017
Himself
  • 2004
93% Undeclared
2001-2002
Rex
  • 2003
  • 2002
No Score Yet The King of Queens
1998-2007
Seamus Spooner
  • 2002
85% The Simpsons
1989
Voice
  • 2002
100% Freaks and Geeks
1999-2000
Guest Secret Service Agent
  • 2000
100% The Larry Sanders Show
1992-1998
  • 1997
100% Mr. Show With Bob and David
1995-1998
Performer
  • 1996
  • 1995
94% Frasier
1993-2004
Voice of Barry
  • 1993
91% The Ben Stiller Show
1992-1993
Producer Director Performer
  • 1993
  • 1992
No Score Yet Kate & Allie
1984-1989
Peter
  • 1986
No Score Yet The Daily Show With Trevor Noah
2015
Guest

QUOTES FROM Ben Stiller CHARACTERS

Derek Zoolander
I lost my kid cuz I cudnt make spaghetti soft
Peter LaFleur
Hey, White.
White Goodman
Yeah?
Peter LaFleur
You look awful fat in those pants.
Derek Jr.
You're the most narcissistic person I've ever met.
Derek Zoolander
But that's not how I see myself.
Derek Zoolander
Checking out his Netflix discs "Jack Ryan and Jack Reacher. Tonight's going to be a real Jack off."
Derek Zoolander
Checking out his Netflix discs Jack Ryan and Jack Reacher. Tonight's going to be a real Jack off.
Derek Zoolander
I'm sorry, I can't understand a word that you're saying.
Derek Zoolander
We're back!
Josh
What is the opposite of the world is your oyster?
Mel Coplin
I've always said it's a mistake to let pessimism take over when you're about to finish something.
White Goodman
Joanie loves Chachi!
Easter Island Head
Hey! Dum-dum!
Larry Daley
Yes?
Easter Island Head
You give me gum-gum!
Larry Daley
I give you gum-gum?
Slide
Look at my face.
Josh Kovacs
Look at my face.
Slide
You see how serious I am?
Josh Kovacs
I'm pretty serious too.
Slide
Are you ready to die bi*ch?
Josh Kovacs
That's my suit.
Slide
Yeah it's your suit I got on your socks and drawers too.
Bwick Elias
Sometimes I feel things.
Lucy Ackerman
What you feel, I treat.
Sean O'Connell
Sometimes I don't. If I like a moment, for me, personally, I don't like to have the distraction of the camera. I just want to stay in it.
Walter Mitty
Stay in it?
Sean O'Connell
Yeah. Right there. Right here.
Tony Perkis
My Grandma runs faster than you and she's only got one leg!!!
Eddie Cantrow
Hey, Martin!
Martin
Hello, asshole.
Eddie Cantrow
Great to see you too!
Tugg Speedman
I was wrong! Blow the bridge! Blow the fucking bridge!
Walter Mitty
To see the world, things dangerous to come to, to see behind walls, draw closer, to find each other, and to feel. That is the purpose of life.
Walter Mitty
To see the world, things dangerous to come to, to see behind walls, to draw closer, to find each other, and to feel. That is the purpose of life.
White Goodman
We should Mate.
Kate Veach
What?
White Goodman
Date. I said we should date sometime.
Kate Veach
Sorry, I just threw up in my mouth a little bit.
White Goodman
Blade
White Goodman
Blade.
White Goodman
Laser
White Goodman
Laser.
Peter LaFleur
Blaser
Peter LaFleur
Blaser.
White Goodman
Peekaboo!
White Goodman
Nobody makes me bleed my own blood. NOBODY!
White Goodman
Nobody makes me bleed my own blood. Nobody!
White Goodman
Joanie loves Chachi.
White Goodman
I know you. You know you. You know that I know that I know you.
Chas Tenenbaum
Is it dark?
Richie Tenenbaum
Of course it's dark, it's a suicide note.
Roger Greenberg
You’re of value.
Roger Greenberg
You're of value.
Florence Marr
I know that. You don’t have to say that.
Florence Marr
I know that. You don't have to say that.
Kirk Lazarus
Me? I know who I am. I'm a dude playing a dude disguised as another dude.
Kevin Sandusky
What?
Kirk Lazarus
You a dude that don't know what dude he is!
Tugg Speedman
Or are you a dude who has no idea what dude he is and claims to know what dude he is..
Tugg Speedman
Or are you a dude who has no idea what dude he is and claims to know what dude he is?
White Goodman
I think we should mate.
Kate Veach
What?
White Goodman
Go on a date. You know, a social date.
Kate Veach
I think I just threw up in my mouth.
White Goodman
I think we should mate.
Kate Veach
What?
White Goodman
Go on a date. You know, a social date.
Kate Veach
I think I just threw up in my mouth.
Alex the Lion
Marty!
Marty the Zebra
Alex!
Alex the Lion
Mar-
Marty the Zebra
Alex?
Alex the Lion
(angry) MARTY!
Alex the Lion
[angry] MARTY!
Marty the Zebra
Oh suger honey ice tea!
Teenage Boy #1
It's Brunden.
Larry Daley
Brunden?
Teenage Boy #1
Bah-run-den
Larry Daley
Brunden..what, they run out of 'U's on the name tag?
Teenage Boy #1
Oh, I don't know; did they run out of jokes at the interesting joke store that you shop at?
Tugg Speedman
(To Kirk) Hold my hand Brother...
Tugg Speedman
[to Kirk] Hold my hand Brother...
Kirk Lazarus
(Holds really dodgy looking sleeve without hands that Ben happens to be wearing)
Kirk Lazarus
[holds really dodgy looking sleeve without hands that Ben happens to be wearing]
Chas Tenenbaum
Why did you try to kill yourself?
Etheline Tenenbaum
Don't press him right now.
Richie Tenenbaum
I wrote a suicide note.
Chas Tenenbaum
You did?
Richie Tenenbaum
Yeah. Right after I regained consciousness.
Alex the Lion
Now I'll have to compeat with Smaou, and is smug little grin, I can't top that.. Cant top that
Alex the Lion
Now I'll have to compeat with Smaou, and is smug little grin, I can't top that... Can't top that.
Roger Greenberg
Life is wasted on people.
Tugg Speedman
Wake up Hop Hop!
Tugg Speedman
Wake up Hop-Hop!
Josh Kovacs
Checkmate.
Steve Arlo
There aren't evil guys and good guys. There are just a bunch of guys.
Steve Arlo
Are you telling me you can speak six languages and fly a jet liner, but you don't know how to file a tax return?...It's never come up?
Steve Arlo
Are you telling me you can speak six languages and fly a jet liner, but you don't know how to file a tax return? It's never come up?
Steve Arlo
(to the client) He has a deeply nuances and throughly functional understanding of human behavior...He understands the criminal mind as well as the innocent mind, the stable mind as well as the psychotic-sociopathic mind, the male as well as the female.
Steve Arlo
[to the client] He has a deeply nuances and throughly functional understanding of human behavior... He understands the criminal mind as well as the innocent mind, the stable mind as well as the psychotic-sociopathic mind, the male as well as the female.
Steve Arlo
(to a friend) I don't think he's ever kissed a girl and he's like thirty something years old.
Steve Arlo
[to a friend] I don't think he's ever kissed a girl and he's like thirty something years old.
Hansel
Why don't you Derelick... my balls?
Derek Zoolander
I can Derelick my own balls, thank you
Derek Zoolander
I can Derelick my own balls, thank you.
Michael Grates
I guess I'm a non-practicing Jew.
Lelaina Pierce
Hey, I'm a non-practicing virgin.
Alex the Lion
[To Mort] Hi there!
Alex the Lion
[to Mort] Hi there!
Mort
[Starts crying]
Mort
[starts crying]
Gloria the Hippo
Oh, did that mean lion hurt you?
Mort
[Sad] Yeah...
Mort
[sad] Yeah...
Gloria the Hippo
Oh I could just dunk you in my coffee!
Alex
I broke your iPod!
Alex
Now sit! Lie down!
Mort
Hehehe! Naughty me...
Alex
Rollover! Good Dubois -- now stay!
Alex
Come on, guys. Operation Penguin Extraction does not include levity. We can't draw attention to ourselves. [whisper] We're invisible. I'm talking really, really quiet.
Marty
Just call me Marty-o Andretti!
Alex
No! You're Sucky-o Andretti!
Alex
Look, I got a good left foot, but without my right foot, I can't walk.
Vitaly
You get fake foot, then you walk.
Alex
I don't want fake foot! Okay?
Alex
Wipe away the tears. Calm down. Where is he? I'm sure I can reason with him.
Tugg Speedman
Tugg Speedman: This is insane. Are you really going to abandon this movie? We're supposed to be a unit! Kirk Lazarus: Suck my unit.
Tugg Speedman
This is insane. Are you really going to abandon this movie? We're supposed to be a unit!
Kirk Lazarus
Suck my unit.
Hitchhiker
seven's the key number hear think about it, seven eleven seven dwarfes, seven man thats the number, seven chipmonks twirling on a branch eating lots of sun flowers on my uncles ranch, you know that old childrens tale from the sea its like dreaming about gorganzolla cheese when its clearly brie time baby, step into my office.?
Hitchhiker
Seven's the key number hear think about it, seven eleven seven dwarfes, seven man thats the number, seven chipmonks twirling on a branch eating lots of sun flowers on my uncles ranch, you know that old childrens tale from the sea its like dreaming about gorgonzola cheese when it's clearly brie time baby, step into my office?
Ted Stroehmann
why.?
Ted Stroehmann
Why?
Hitchhiker
cause your fucking fired.
Hitchhiker
Cause your fucking fired.
Ted Stroehmann
yeah you know what i gotta pee im just gonna pull over.
Ted Stroehmann
Yeah you know what I gotta pee, I'm just gonna pull over.
Hitchhiker
im only waiting seven minutes total.
Hitchhiker
I'm only waiting seven minutes total.
Alex
This is right place for Animals like you(saying to Dubois)
Alex
This is right place for animals like you. [saying to Dubois]
Captain Chantal Dubois
Roar
Captain Chantal Dubois
Roar.
Derek Zoolander
Just because we have chiseled abs and stunning features doesn't mean that we still can't not die in a freak gasolinefight accident.
Larry Daley
Everything in the museum come to life at night!
White Goodman
Oh, I don't think I'm a lot dumber than you think that I thought that I thought I was once.
Evan
Your glutes are tighter than a snare drum.
Alex the Lion
Be sure to visit my web site. 24-hour webcam. Watch me sleep.
Alex the Lion
Shut up Spalding!
Marty the Zebra
Did you ever think that there might be more to life than steak, Alex?
Alex the Lion
[to his steak] He didn't mean that, baby. No, no, no.
Alex the Lion
27, 28, 29, 30. Hmm, 30 black and only 29 white, looks like you're black with white stripes after all. Dilemma solved. Good night!
Alex the Lion
What does Connecticut have to offer us?
Melman the Giraffe
Lyme disease.
Alex the Lion
Thank you, Melman.
Tony Perkis
Seamore Butts? Whose Seamore Butts? Whose Seamore Butts?!
Josh Birnbaum
Nobody sees more butts then YOU Uncle Tony!!!
Josh Birnbaum
Nobody sees more butts then YOU Uncle Tony!
Bob
A bunch of aliens have set up tents in your store. What are you gonna do about it?
Evan
....Costco is for members only.
Alex the Lion
[Singing to Marty] Happy birthday to you! You live in a zoo! You look like a monkey, aannnndddd you smell like one, too!
Franklin
Look at his face!
Evan
Look at my face.
Franklin
Look at his face and listen to me.
Evan
Look at him and listen to me.
Franklin
Look at me.
Evan
Look at me.
Franklin
Look at him and understand me. Look at both of us but understand no one. Listen to my words and hear his face!
Evan
I see you.
Evan
Mother....
Hero Alien
Hit's Evan
Hero Alien
[hit's Evan]
Mr. Furious
I don't need a compass to know which way the wind shines.
Tugg Speedman
It's just corn syrup you guys! Blood flavored...corn syrup.
White Goodman
Fucking Chuck Norris.
White Goodman
We're better than you, and we know it!
Evan
[Looking at green gunge] What a second I've seen this stuff before
Evan
[looking at green gunge] What a second I've seen this stuff before.
Franklin
Had you just won a Nickelodeon Kid's choice award
Franklin
Had you just won a Nickelodeon Kid's choice award.
Slide
What you trying to steal?
Josh Kovacs
Twenty Million Dollars.
Slide
Let's go grab a bite to eat.
Derek Zoolander
Merman.......... MERMAN!
Derek Zoolander
Merman... MERMAN!
Alex the Lion
Happy birthday to you, you live in a zoo, you look like a monkey, aannnndddd, you smell like one to!
Alex
They can take animals out off circus but they can't take the animal out off the circus!!!!
Alex
They can take animals out off circus but they can't take the animal out off the circus!
Alex
Zebras can't drive! Only penguins and people can drive.
Marty the Zebra
Excuse me, you're biting my butt!
Alex the Lion
No I'm not.
Marty the Zebra
Yes you are!
Alex
Wait, this isn't New York.
Melman
Well then how do we move through Europe without attracting attention?
Alex
All right what are we waiting for? We've got a show to put on!
Shoveler
Don't start that again. Lance Hunt wears glasses, Captain amazing doesn't wear glasses.
Mr. Furious
He takes them off when he transforms.
Shoveler
That doesn't make any sense. he wouldn't be able to see.
Marty
Dat dat dat datta dat dat circus afro circus afro circus afro crircus poka dot poka dot afro
Marty
Dat dat dat datta dat dat circus afro circus afro circus afro crircus poka dot poka dot afro.
Alex
Really?
Alex
Perfect!
White Goodman
We shouldn't be shackled up the employer/employee relationship...unless you're into that kind of stuff a ha ha, cause I got some shackles in the back! a ha ha, just kidding, but really, I got them.
Kate Veach
Are you reading the dictionary?
White Goodman
You caught me! I like to break a mental sweat
White Goodman
You caught me! I like to break a mental sweat.
White Goodman
Thats me grabbing the bull by the horns...its a metaphor
White Goodman
That's me grabbing the bull by the horns... it's a metaphor.
Kate Veach
I get it
Kate Veach
I get it.
White Goodman
That really happened though
White Goodman
That really happened though.
White Goodman
Nobody makes me bleed my own blood! Nobody!!!
White Goodman
Nobody makes me bleed my own blood... nobody!
White Goodman
You ready for the- Whoo- Hurricane?
White Goodman
You ready for the, whoo, hurricane?
White Goodman
Donde Esta La Biblioteca Pedro
White Goodman
Donde esta la biblioteca, Pedro?
Peter LaFleur
(At the Bar) O hey White, I didnt know Nazi camp got out until 8...did you decide to skip arts and craft?
Peter LaFleur
[at the bar] Oh hey White, I didnt know Nazi camp got out until 8... did you decide to skip arts and craft?
White Goodman
Yes I Did!!!!
White Goodman
Yes I did!
Greg Focker
Bomb bomb bomb, bomb bomb bomb bomb, bomb bomb bomb bomb bomb bomb bomb bomb, what are you gonna do, arrest me?!
Isabel
So many wonderful memories from those days..
Greg Focker
Yeah, so many wonderful... kind of private memories..
Isabel
So... you didn't tell your fiancee about us?
Tony Perkis
Get on the scale! Get off the scale.
Josh Kovacs
You think Steve McQueen is the coolest cat that ever lived? Well guess what, today Steve McQueen is my little bitch!
Josh Kovacs
Slide, we gotta use the truck. Where are the keys?
Slide
Under the sun visor.
Mr. Fitzhugh
You leave the keys? In New York?
Slide
It's a stolen car!
Mr. Fitzhugh
You brought a stolen car? To a robbery?
Alex the Lion
Because the penguins are psychotic!!
Matilda
I'm bulimic.
Derek Zoolander
... You mean you can read minds?
Derek Zoolander
Eugoogiligist: A person who delivers eugoogiligies.
Derek Zoolander
Moisture is the essence of wetness.
Derek Zoolander
What is this? A center for ants?
Derek Zoolander
im just wearing my new look cold coffee
Derek Zoolander
I'm just wearing my new look -- Cold Coffee.